Greyscale Memories
by Mouldy-Cheesecake
Summary: England hasn't been seen for days after storming out of a world meeting so Alaska has been sent to find out if he is alright but it brings back memories from the past that she just didn't want to remember... a crappy summary but please read! my 1st fanfic


**AN: this is my first Hetalia fic and i was very nervous putting this up here so please be kind to me -_-" I hope that this story is better than I think it is and you don't all flame me if its as bad as I think please help me and tell me how to improve ^_^ **

**Alaska is my OC and you will find out more about her in the stories I write and upload (that is if you want me to :S) She is America and Canada's little sister and was raised by France and England so that explains why she is going to check on England in the story :) thank you for reading and I hope you like it **

Alaska walked up the cobbled road that led to England s house, it was an awful day the rain falling in torrents and soaking any who dared to step outside. She pulled her hood further over her face and sighed, why did she have to go and check on the old man it wasn't her fault he had barricaded himself in his house for days. It was that stupid gits fault, America knew better than to bring up /that/ subject when speaking to him especially after the pain they had all been through no-one knew more than Him.

Her feet made soft thudding noises as she stepped onto the welcome mat on the porch, the frayed and tatty mat was the sole survivor of his obsessive spring cleaning. The old oak door had been painted since the last time she had visited it was now a dark olive green rather than the post box red she had last seen. 'I need to visit more' she muttered before thumping the door. 'England?' she shouted 'Open up'. The door remained solidly there and very much shut. Glaring at the wood in front of her she growled. 'It s me England get your arse to this door now or God help me I ll kick it down!' Still the wood stared back resolutely keeping her out of the house, the glare increased at this point even Russia would've given up the struggle and combusted... the wood didn't even have the decency to smoke a little. Her ice-like eyes narrowed and she stepped back, just as she raised her leg to deliver a powerful kick to the door, it moved. 'Finally England!' she said an irate edge to her voice which quickly changed to suspicious when she saw no-one on the other side of the door.

The house was dark, musty and clothes littered the floor, she made a 'tsk' noise at the mess, which echoed slightly in the gloom. England must be feeling really crap for it to be this bad usually he had everything in exactly the right place, like the grump old man he was. Well unless her uncles had visited then the house was usually destroyed. She smirked slightly remembering the last time they had all been round. Door hanging off its hinges, furniture destroyed, walls broken and blood stains in the carpet. A fun family get together.

As she walked through the rooms there was more and more evidence of a depressed England. Old photo albums were littering the floor in the living room, covering the pale carpet so it could barely be seen. Pictures of their family stared up at her. Moments frozen in time, perfect in their own little way. Pausing at the table she picked up the photo there. It was the only one removed from the albums.

It was them, well the old them. France was holding her and Canada in his arms, the two of them grinning widely, while Canada just had a shy smile spread over his face half hidden behind his little bear. America was sat on England s shoulders his hands in the air and a massive, beaming, thousand watt smile splattered over his face. England had a similar smile, the happiness in his expression rivalled America's, one hand was holding America's foot the other was curled around France's waist loosely. Alaska felt the tears prick at the edges of her eyes. She remembered the day this had been taken, they had been a proper family then before the revolution and the wars, they had been younger and happier than they had ever been since. She placed the photo gently back onto the table and resumed her search for the missing country.

The kitchen had half prepared food on the side and milk which after a quick check was very much off. Putting the carton into the bin she sighed, it looked as though he hadn't been eating much either, the fridge was practically empty and a search of the cupboards brought up teabags and half a biscuit along with cans that had no labels and strawberry jam. Concluding the search of the ground floor she made her way up the stair case, converse squeaking slightly on the laminate flooring. As she neared the top she heard a soft sniffling sound coming from the direction of the only shut door on this floor. She quietly made her way over and knocked gently on the wood. She heard a thud that sounded like a body muffled by covers falling from the bed.

'Go away you git' came the angry reply but Alaska could hear the tears and broken half-sob. She sighed and rolled her eyes.

'Its me old man' she said a little annoyed to be called a git though he had reason to suspect she was her brother he should be here anyway not her. She waited at the door for a few minutes the shuffling sounds reaching her ears told her that England was moving towards the door. When it opened she stopped her eyes from widening at the sight before her. England s hair was a mess, the dirty blond bangs sticking up at odd angles and the rest tangled into rough knots. His face was extremely pale and the bags under his eyes made him look like a corpse. His forest green eyes usually so alive looked dead and grey no hint of emotion behind them, they didn't even show any recognition at seeing her. Alaska felt herself begin to tear up at the sight of the proud and strong country looking as though he had been crushed. it reminded her too fiercely of the revolution, how much it had hurt to break away.

_The rain soaked her clothes and flattening her hair to her face, dripping off the end of her nose and hands. The harsh smell of gunpowder and blood hung in thick clouds around them. The rain mixed with the tears that fell from her eyes as she watched England fall at America's feet sobbing his shoulders slumped. He had been unable to shoot, he loved them to much. Her heart broke when he looked up the green eyes she was so used to pleading with her, begging her to come back to him. She choked on the lump rising in her throat and looked down. Her sobs could be heard by the soldiers and the two men who stood alone in the mud. England s face broke all of the pain he had been trying to hide showed on his face. She wanted so much to run to him and have him hug her like he had when she was little and tell her everything was okaii and it was just a nightmare. She longed to know that she was safe and loved... _

She rushed forwards and wrapped her arms around him pressing her face to his chest, the tears soaking into his shirt.. He smelt like tea and his clothes had a distinct musty smell like they had been worn for days. Her shoulders shook violently and her hands clenched into fists on his back gripping the material so tight her knuckles went white. The reason she had come over completely forgotten the only thing that mattered now was remembering the feeling of the pain and doing what she didn't do all those years ago. A few seconds went by before she felt a pair of arms wrap around her and a face rest on the top of her head.

'its okaii, its okaii' he said over and over, reassuring her, promising not to leave. Her tears slowed, quieting to soft hic-cups and shakes. The gentle soothing sound of his voice slowing the tears making her feel 7 again, just woken from a nightmare but safe now, nothing bad would happen here. She could hear his heart beat and the steady rhythm that continued to calm her until her breathing was smooth. She still didn't let go of him but her grip loosened slightly.

'Promise?' she said in a voice thick with tears he simply nodded and held her tighter. She sighed and closed her eyes again; it wouldn't be like last time. This time they wouldn't be alone.

**AN: please let me know if you want more **

**time taken: roughly 4 hours in all I think :) **


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